Sunday Dinner at Grandma's: A Feel Good Story

My family doesn’t have too many traditions.  I mean, sure, we celebrated Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter.  We even did the black eyed peas at midnight for New Year’s.  But we didn’t have our “own” traditions that were just ours alone.  Thank God for Sundays.

Every Sunday, my Mom, Grandma, or even my uncle would cook up a meal so good you would want to slap them.  I couldn’t wait to get out of church just so I could get my “eat on”.  And it wasn’t just me waiting for the last amens to be said.  My aunts would join in on Sunday’s dinner also.  Sometimes, friends, grandchildren, cousins, and uncles would drop by to fix them a plate.  Other times, it was just my immediate family gathered around the kitchen table enjoying one another’s company.

You see, Sunday’s dinner was not just about the food.  It was about the coming together of a family.  It was about camaraderie. We laughed together, gossiped together, and overate together.  A lot of bonding went on at the dinner table.

Although, we have all gotten older and some of us have moved on, Sunday dinner is still an important part in my life.  Sometimes, I just sit back and listen to my aunt and grandma go back and forth.  Sometimes, it’s me getting “sassy” with my grandma.  But it is all in good fun.  And at the end of the day, we all walk away from the table full of food, full of love, and full of respect for each other.  Thank God for Sundays!!!!

Just Saying,

Niesey

A Woman's Worth Part II

I previously posted a note on Facebook entitled “A Woman’s Worth” almost a year ago.  And although I spoke about it once, I thought it would be a good idea to reiterate and elaborate on what was already said.  Why? Because so many of us women DO NOT know our worth.

When we come into this world, it is our parents’ duty to mold us and to teach us.  We learn from their actions, from their mistakes.  Notice I said “parents” meaning a mother and a father.  And all those single mothers out there saying that their kids don’t need a father, let me say this to you—YOU ARE SO WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS IT AIN’T EVEN FUNNY.  A child needs their father.  A boy needs his father to nurture him and to teach him how to be a man.  A girl needs her father to nurture her and to set the example of what a good man is. 

When that bond between father and daughter is not a good one-when that foundation is faulty, it can have a negative impact on her.    She’ll grow up trying to fill that void in her heart.  Looking for love in all the wrong places because her father wasn’t there for her.  And no, being in the same house as him doesn’t necessarily mean he’s there for her.  He’s just in the house with her.  If he isn’t taking the time and effort to know his daughter or to spend time with her, then he isn’t supporting her emotionally or mentally.  And if he’s just absent from his daughter’s life, baby girl is going to find the love somewhere whether it’s healthy or not.  She’ll try to hold on to relationships that need to be let go just to feel wanted and needed, and all because she doesn’t know her worth.

Fathers, you are the first man that enters your daughters’ lives.  You are the first man she falls in love with.  Do you really want to ruin that for her?  Do you really want to be the first man to break her heart?

I know some of you are shaking your heads right now, but that’s okay.  We are adults and we can agree to disagree.  But throughout my life, I have encountered so many women who didn’t have a strong foundation built by their fathers.  They didn’t have the support they needed from them, and they were constantly hanging on to dead beat boyfriends or husbands because they thought that was all they deserved.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not putting down the single mothers out there.  My heart goes out to you because you have the toughest job in the world.  But it shouldn’t be just your job alone.  You can only do so much for your child, and all the love and support you give to your child may not be enough especially for your daughter.  I say this because this blog is a very personal one for me.  This blog is about me.  And I was that girl looking for love when there was no love to be found.  I gave myself to men that weren’t worth a penny.  I let them take from me—my body, my mind.  I was trying to find some type of validation from them.  I was trying to fill that void that my dad left when he walked away.  And my mother did all she could to fill that void for me, but it just wasn’t the same.  I felt empty.

It took me a long time to realize that I’m worth something more than just a one night stand.  And with my birthday just around the corner, I still struggle with my self worth.  I take it day by day.  But I know I’m definitely not the person I was ten years ago (or even just a year ago).  I’m still growing.  I’m still learning.  And I’m finally rediscovering myself…..MY WORTH….

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/sy-18502765/john_mayer_daughters_official_music_video/ 

Just Saying,

Niesey

Sharper Than a Two-Edged Sword

 DING! DING!
     In this corner, we have one of  the most  controversial conservatives in America-- Rush Limbaugh.  And in this corner we have all shapes, sizes, nationalities, and ethnicities also known as --the World.  Let the name game begin!!!!

By now, everyone has read about the harsh words Rush Limbaugh had to say to Sandra Fluke, a law student at Georgetown University.  And if you have not, now is the time to go do some research before you continue to read what I'm about to say....

Throughout my life, I have been called much worse than what Mr. Limbaugh called Ms. Fluke.  And it's most likely, in the near future, someone will get mad at me and call me everything but a child of  God.  Will I get upset? Probably.  Will I be offended? Maybe.  Will I turn around and spit out words that would make my grandmother blush?  I would be lying if I answered no to that question.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that what Mr. Limbaugh said was right.  Nor did I say I agree with him or what he said.  I am saying that we are so quick to put others down and call them names when we disagree with them and they disagree with us.

We are so wrapped up in "freedom of speech" that we lose sight of what is actually coming out of our mouths.  And just because we have this "freedom," does it mean we can abuse it and misuse it?  What happened to the good old days of good old fashioned "debate?"  Where two parties, on opposite sides, came together and discussed their point of view without the drawing of blood?  What happened to the right to  voice an opinion without being called names?  And most importantly, what happened to R-E-S-P-E-C-T?

Just because someone does not agree with your views does not mean that, that person is wrong.  It doesn't mean that, that person is a "slut" or a "prostitute".  It doesn't mean that, he/she is self righteous or an out of control liberal.  EVERYONE is different.  We think differently.  Our feelings are different.  We have different beliefs and different passions.  BUT just because we have these differences, does not mean we have to belittle each other just because we can.  We are ALL a part of this race called Life.

I was always told "there is a time and a place for everything so choose your battles wisely."  And "some things are better left unsaid."  But my favorite one is "if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all."  I thank my mom and grandma for passing these sayings down to me.  Because if we all listened and adhered to these sayings, then maybe we would have a better understanding of one another.  Maybe we would be a little bit more patient and a little bit more forgiving.  And maybe we would all think before we opened our mouths to speak.....Or would we?

Just Saying,
Niesey